What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Why can’t Trump campaign on the real issues facing America rather than insulting the character of VP Harris? Does MAGA actually believe this tactic will work?

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Why are people becoming increasingly hostile to pro-lifers? I am pro-life.

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

My girlfriend told me that she wants to move in with me. I have my own apartment and I like my peace and quiet, but I also love her. We've been together for a year now. What should I do?

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Make Nazis afraid again!

Why do liberals think same-sex marriage is alright? The Bible makes it very clear that it's not alright to be gay, why can't liberals understand that?

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Artists get better with age, e.g., painting. Yet when it comes to pop music, the famous work tends to be written when musicians are in their twenties. So, why aren't Bob Dylan or the Stones banging out amazing tunes now?

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

What is the alleged false reason behind Prince Harry's desperate demands for IPP (Intimate Partner Protection) for Meghan Markle and their family?

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Is there anything wrong with me because I'm still single?

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

What is your secret to glowing skin?

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

What are the strangest parts of The Bible?

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

TEXT:

When a black man and a white woman have a child, does the child become white? If a white man and a black woman have a child, does the child become black?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

In what ways does Bollywood represent India's culture to the rest of the world through movies, songs, and dance? Is this representation accurate?

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!